He was in the restaurant business his entire life. Early hours were nothing new to Al Syken. He weighed about 140 pounds but his whole life was devoted to food. And nothing made him happier than to see someone enjoying one of his special recipes.
Years ago (1995), Cantor Shapiro, of blessed memory, came up with the idea of having a breakfast on Monday and Thursday mornings after minyan. For a month or two Cantor Shapiro shopped for and set out the food himself, but it soon became too overwhelming. So Gd sent Al. Al had lost his wife, Lenore just a few weeks earlier and he volunteered to prepare the breakfasts. Within a few weeks we went from bagels and cream cheese to lox and eggs, blintzes, fresh fruit and homemade cheese cake. (And shnapps, too.) The smell of fried onions would hit you when you got out of your car! Minyan attendance rose steadily. We had such good crowds that I decided to teach during the Thursday morning breakfasts. We had “benchers” made up so we could sing the grace after meals.
Eventually, Al got too weak to make the breakfast, and others took over for him. Years later, the breakfasts live on. Unfortunately, Al Syken does not. His funeral was Sunday. There were 10 family members. Five or six friends from work and his neighborhood came, and about a dozen regulars of the daily minyan were at the funeral, too. Al departed this world the way he lived in it, in his own quiet, and unassuming way. But I really do believe that Gd sent Al to Beth El for a purpose. When he had no reason to live, the breakfast became his cause. When he had no friends, the minyan became his social set. And when we needed someone to show us what a big difference a few small gestures of hospitality could make, Al was there to teach us.
What I love most about my position at Beth El (somehow the word “job” just doesn’t describe it) is the myriad of wonderful souls I meet, all different and yet each with so much to give. I learn so much from so many good people, all trying their best to lead good and noble lives. All, in their own small ways, are making a big difference in the lives of others, bigger than they will ever know. I am thankful that in our busy world there is a quiet Chapel where relationships are formed and friendships flourish. I imagine that in the world to come, Al is thankful, too.
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6 comments:
That minyan is most likely Beth El's best kept secret and the place that got me through one of the worst years of my life. Al was part of that with a lot of heart and the best Roquefort dressing you would ever want to taste. At that time there were very few women who went daily, and to this day I am so grateful for the very special people who opened their hearts to me. More people should go there, you come out with a warm feeling that you don't get anywhere else.
Thanks for your comment. Just a few hours after I read it, a woman came into my office to talk about a loss she had just suffered. I suggested that she might find comfort in the Chapel at minyan and then I opened the blog and showed her your comment. She was moved to tears. My guess is we'll see her soon.
Al was one of the truly good guys, his cheesecake was phenominal, he did so much for the minyan and asked for nothing.Like many former minyanaires they enriched our minyan experiance and our lives.
I can't think of any place I would rather be on a Thursday morning at 7:15 AM
Let me tell you about "my" minyan. What is now more than a few years ago I suffered the loss of a loved one. I walked into that minyan never intending to go beyond the seven days fo shiva. Seven days turned into thirty, and thirty turned into a year straight. To anyone who loses a parent I encourage you to go for the year. It is not fun, it is not convenient. It is hard to rearrange your life around the clock that becomes Mincha and Maariv. And, to rearrange the lives of your children. When you first walk in there someone will welcome you, and in essence, you will find that you have come home. You enter broken, and leave whole and the journey along the way is incredible. Some days you cry, some days you laugh. Some days you pray, some you daven and some you sit there and your mind wanders to a place that has nothing to do with the pages in front of you. And when it is all said and done, you will learn more in that year about your faith, your love of Gd and yourself than you can ever imagine.
For myself, I owe my life to that minyan, to that year. You will never know how you did it, but in the end you will know why.
I still go back to minyan when I can, and when I do, I find that I am home and I leave there with the most incredible sense of peace, of strength, of faith and of love.
The years go by, and time goes on but what i have learned by going there stands still.
To anyone who loses a loved one go the year, take the journey. It will forever be the hardest year that you can imagine but in the end it will make you a better Jew, a better person and it will heal your soul.
Thank you for this last comment. The strength and spirit of your words leave me numb. I am grateful to be part of a shul that can support a minyan like ours; one that can touch lives as deeply and profoundly as it has touched yours. Thank you so much for sharing; I hope that many others find the peace of which you speak.
Your website has a useful information for beginners like me.
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